Positive Update: My [25F] boyfriend [27M] says he’s bored with my body.
Original post here:
10 months ago, I posted to this subreddit as I was feeling heartbroken, lost, and confused. The words anyone dreads hearing had been spoken to me by my partner of 6 years at the time and I just had no idea where to go from there.
The advice I got was astronomical. So many people provided their insights and I thank you all, from the bottom of my heart, for helping me find the courage to sit down and tackle the problems that had been plaguing my relationship for years.
The night after I posted this, I sat down with my boyfriend and had a serious heart to heart. I told him how his words had hurt me, and expressed my concerns around his addiction to using porn to stimulate himself. I asked him if he wanted to put the work in to have this relationship work and he agreed to stop watching it, and for us to seek couples therapy together. He apologized for how cold his words were and provided me with comfort that he wants to make this work, as I am his best friend and he did love me deeply, he had just lost sight of that over the years.
It only took two therapy sessions. Two therapy sessions gave him the wake up call he needed to realise that I wasn't the problem. From that point on, he has provided me with the love I had needed for years. He has 100% stopped watching porn and our sex life has skyrocketed from the previous barren desert that it was.
We're now discussing getting married, properly planning a future together, and we're tackling any challenges together, instead of keeping our thoughts bottled until they explode into what they did last August. Our 7th anniversary is coming up in August 🙂
I've worked on myself too. I found that by working on myself, it encouraged him to take the steps to better himself too. We've both gone out and gotten our health in order and we're working on the outcomes of that together, supporting each other in both of our journeys to become the best people we possibly can be.
Reddit, you're a lawless land, but honestly… Thank you. Without you, I would've lost so much and had to start over. In a sea of confusion, you were the guiding light that helped me get my head on straight after being blindsided by a poorly worded confession that had been years in the making.