I (41f) told my daughter (22f) about the truth of her birth and it’s gone horribly
It's complicated but to put it plainly, my late husband was raised by a foster family. His foster sister took advantage of him, and our eldest, Scarlett, is biologically hers. My husband wanted to protect her and got custody, and I became her mother when she was around 8 months old.
Scarlett and her fiance took dna ancestry tests to support his adoptive sister when she did hers. Scarlett found out she has a half-sister, and tried to talk to me about it. I tried to be vague but she wasn't having it, and I couldn't discourage her from reaching out. It got heated and I ended up telling her the truth about it, and why we never told her. I reassured her that we loved her, and that it didn't mean anything about her. That she was our daughter and meant the world to us. She was understandably shocked and left. Since then I've tried to give her space, just letting her know I love her and am happy to talk anytime.
However a few days ago her fiance came over and just lost it at me. He didn't understand why I told her and claimed that if I loved her I would take that secret to the grave. Apparently she's taken it extremely badly, and practically hates herself. It sounds like she's taken it extreme, but he didn't explain much, just blame me. I tried to reach out to her, but I keep getting no response.
I honestly feel horrible. I love her just as much as our other children. We've always been really close, and I never meant to hurt her with this. She just wouldn't take any less than a proper explanation. I never meant for it to go like this, and I feel so lost. I don't have anyone I can talk to about it and it's just eating me up inside. I never meant for it to go this way, I honestly love her so much. How can I fix it?
