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The ex girlfriend’s hunting could be a perfect name for a horror movie
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Um, get divorced and find yourself a person who behaves like an adult and also isn't so lacking in the most basic level of empathy and compassion that they can't even treat a puppy kindly?
I'd understand this behaviour in a 7 year old, but in an adult it's frankly pathetic.
Not at all related to the thread but do you know if labradors are good puppies for first time owners? We're looking at getting one this year if we can and want to be good owners to it, but neither of us know what tf we're doing. Intending on training classes and asking friends who have raised dogs for assistance when the time comes.
I think there is part mismanagement of your time which negatively affected your friendships, and part your friends’ lack of understanding your priorities and your relationship.
You should choose your partner at NYE and your friends should be understanding of that. However, I’m not sure how serious you are with this girl honestly, and that matters too.
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He was being a pedophile, you said so yourself then salivated over pictures of her as a fucking teenager. She has a lot to work through in therapy before being ready to date if she still has him in her life. And you are being fucking awful, and shouldn’t date anybody until you’ve had therapy and grown the fuck up. Leave this poor girl alone.
just because it’s unfamiliar to you, it doesn’t mean that therapy is a “bad” thing. you ought to give it a try to work on your insecurities, it could be very helpful for you! i think therapy could be a good choice for you if you decide to give it a shot. 🙂
You need to decide what you are willing to put up with. At what point do you say I refuse to live! this way? If he does whatever he wants and gets away with it, he has no incentive to change his behavior. You can't force him to be the man you want him to be. The only thing you can do is decide if you want to play second fiddle to literally everyone. From what you posted, your needs come last.
He has shown you who he is, and what is important to him. What are you going to do with this knowledge?
If you’re breaking up (which you should) you don’t owe him anything. If you want to stay together, then what you’re doing is called stonewalling and it isn’t a healthy way to address conflict.
My guess is that he's oblivious, or just sees having sex as being not that big a deal. It's like you decided to go to a restaurant together, and he didn't like the food as much as you did. He says so, quits thinking about it, and expects life to go on as before.
Either he's telling the truth and the person he is now is not the man you fell in love with. If he's not getting help for his issues, there's no guarantee that another “switch” won't happen again. The fact that he refuses to get help would be a reason to leave him.
Or he's lying and frankly anyone who would be that manipulative and deceitful is someone you need to cut out of your life ASAP.
Break things off with him and get therapy for yourself because this kind of thing can really mess you up and make it difficult to trust in future relationships.
You’re not being polite, you’re being a doormat. If you want to stay with such a disrespectful prat then take your key back at least or change your locks.
M should lose F’s number. Go no contact and never look back.
You really must try to listen to the women in these comments. Saying “no” outright is at best, meaningless to many men (not just pick up artists lol) and dangerous at worst. Having lived in major cities most of my life, at 33 I have been hit on by strangers hundreds if not thousands of times. I have NEVER had a man graciously leave me alone when I’ve said no. Most- not some, MOST- get aggressive and frightening when you say no. Even in public spaces where I did feel generally safe. I’m queer and have had men plead, beg, harass and follow me while I am literally hand in hand with another woman, more times than I can count. This isn’t some kind of weird anomaly, this is completely normal to the majority of us.
I'm sorry you went thru that, but like many mental illnesses limerence can usually be treated and managed with proper therapy and support. Its extremely hot, but it can be done.
However when there is so much stigma and shame, and when your support network abandons you the odds of recovery become vanishingly slim.
You are probably right. I feel like it could potentially breed resentment on her part of she feels forced to give up her family but you are not wrong it would be best for them to present a United front. Hopefully therapy is in the future for them and they can get to a good place.
Mate, you didn’t just download Tinder; you paid for the premium version. There’s no such thing as “just downloading” a dating app while you’re in a relationship, but you definitely can’t play that card when you’ve spent actual money on it.
You need to ask her this directly. Did she contact them for support or not? Could she be using this to hoover you? Can you contact them?
You had different plans for the future and parted ways instead of wasting each others time. More people should have the maturity and self awareness to be able to do what you do.
It is beyond disgusting. I thought romanticizing it to fix it was a joke.
Ugh what a POS I'm sorry you went through that ❤️
Well I hope you're not having an organism. An orgasm is what you want. Autocorrect strikes again.
If rent is going to be payed it should be to the parents. but the money isn't going to the parents its going to her and she has all her expenses covered so how is she entitled to charge him rent that makes no sense.
I get where you're coming from but unless she's being flirty with others and her behaviour has changed then she isn't cheating on you. You're both young and you're both going to change and mature, you should be able to talk to her about it but it might be time to end it if it bothers you so much.
I don’t wear bras either, for the sole purpose of sheer and crochet tops (if you are in a country like the USA) you may want to throw out a “do you think you need a nipple cover under that top? I don’t want you to get a ticket or arrested or anything” If her answer is no then just leave it at that and if there are consequences to her wardrobe then those will be hers to deal with.
It's basically a very weak acid exfoliant. You'd get far better results from using a properly formulated acid product (amlactin, cerave's salicylic acid cleanser, loreal's glycolic acid cleanser, etc) but some people don't realise that's what milk soaps are.
Maybe men your age don’t anymore. But people my age do. And if you’ve dated a 18-25 year old recently, you would notice that their expectations are a lot higher than what you would think.
That doesn’t make things worse. I mean, TMI but I’ll share it to help you, I have gotten very turned on before and wet to the thought of a crush doing something to me. To the point I had to play with myself. And just to make it very clear, this could be a guy who I have never even kissed. It’s just a fantasy once again. Just daydreaming about them and what I’d like for him to do that leads to that. Thoughts like that pop up before and during. It’s seriously really normal for a lot of people. I promise you’re overthinking it.
It’s a private thought we have that we keep to ourselves during a private time. It’s not gross or weird in any way unless you harass someone. Someone will never know that you thought about them while getting off unless you make it a point to tell them. It’s just a fun little secret.
Which is why you’re here writing dissertations. You sound triggered- please see a therapist about your unresolved trauma.
My partner doesnt like morning breath kissing either, so I kiss him on the forehead and regroup later after the teeth have been brushed.
ngl this is the cutest thing I've heard and if your mom doesn't think the same she's really wrong.
Fwiw I think you are being completely reasonable and rational. I think you need to make it crystal clear what you can and can't promise and see how she responds.
If he loses you as a friend it would be the consequences of his own actions. Coercing someone into physical intimacy is NEVER ok regardless of anyone's sexuality. Using your friendship as ammunition to try to get you to do so makes it even worse.
Look I hate when people jump to wild conclusions on here but your boyfriend is %100 fucking his boss
You have been together 2 years. You either trust him or you dont. If you dont trust him, then break up.
It does sound like you are too needy/demanding. If my partner was whining and crying over a 10 day trip, I would probably be avoiding phone calls too.
I know, it’s super fucking weird, and I hate it. But I don’t hate him. That’s why I posted it here. I wanted advice on this situation, and I’m getting a pretty good idea of what I can say to better help me make a decision about everything.
show him a fat toad with its neck puffed out and be like “hahah look it’s your dick and balls”
He can't make pancakes nor can he make a vagina but he likes them both.
He is 35. He isn't a young adult who still find his way who he is. This is who he is. Abuser often behave in the beginning to listen when they see it will make them lose their victim, but they fall back in their behaviour because they doesn't change. It would need years(!) of therapy to change and first they must realize that they musg need change.
Why do you want to run open eyes in a knife? You know he is a controling abuser. They always have nice sides. Otherwise they wouldn't find victims. You know how women of violent men also think they can change him because he stops for a little while. Don’t be like them.
And i wunder if your therapist is specialized on abuse. I mean you mostly talked to them about it and sorry, you still have such naive views as if you never were in an abusive relationship. I don’t mean it bad, just that you maybe need specialized therapy.
WALK AWAY, PERMANENTLY.
Get therapy to understand what red flags you missed when you met him.
It doesn't change anything in my advice. You're clearly, and reasonably, very unhappy in this relationship.
Please leave him, what he doesn’t want you to know is you too good for him, so he’s trying to wear you down.
But you deserve so much better then him, and that person is out there waiting for you to dump him.
You’re 34 and he’s 44. I think you can have a grown-up conversation.
Honestly your whole excuse for his treatment of her is embarrassing. He is not the only one getting married and has no reason to lash out like he has, stressed or not. The fact that you think this kind of behavior is acceptable and valid on his behalf is mind blowing.
Well done on that. I guess it’ll just have to come out raw and unadulterated.
When you confess, it’s important do add the points about how you believe he wouldn’t change for you and thus an actual relationship wouldn’t work.
If he has any of the same desires, he’ll make them known and maybe you guys can compromise. If not, at least that is a massive weight off of your shoulders. Must be tough carrying around a secret like that all the time.
Honestly my main concern is does he only like them younger? I mean do you have to be a 10/10 or an 18 year old for him to wanna marry you?
I mean I’m fully aware he has a high body count so I assumed some of the girls would be questionable.
But being honest of course I’m gonna be 40 one day so then what he will leave me for an 18 year old.
Also is the reason a man with high body count decided to abstain for a few years or give me anything I want (something he wasn’t doing with any girls I saw in his texts) is because I’m prettier and financially better off than him.
And when was the last time he told you he missed you?
Fuck this dude. If anything, her achievement sounds all the more impressive when you consider that it is something she acomplished despite this asshole just spectating instead of stepping up and being a father, or even just a decent man.
smash and dash
So if it makes it entertaining then it is a hobby…. that is what a hobby means. But at least I don't need to go to a strip club to get turned on or to find entertainment. And yes I have many more to do that are actual hobbies.