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For me (and this goes both ways), in a healthy relationship you should be comfy having her see your messages, but she should never ask to.
You are not dating. You are paying the rent, she gets no say
Thank you for this. I am like this but didn't know there was a word for it.
WTF you can't just assume whats wrong with her off a very vague set of symptoms on the internet. If she has a medical issue leave it to a doctor.
Also stop sex shaming OP, its bigoted.
You don't need to access his phone in an emergency, that's not why you want it.
You're asking for the right to invade his privacy.
Don’t make excuses for him omfg. And what is with this sub and half the issues between people with ridiculous age gaps? Ma’am – you’re ENABLING a pervert. And making excuses! I am disgusted that you even said “there’s nothing illegal about it” to justify it. Gross.
Stay civil and polite, and draw boundaries if she acts rudely towards you.
Other than that, let it go. You can't be everyone's cup of tea. I always remind myself that even chocolate is not universally liked haha.
Just a stranger, but there is a common thread among fatherhood in america where a father denigrates their child due to their own insecurities, and they do that ultimately because their fathers did it to them. Generational trauma/abuse pattern. This fits right in. Your erstwhile partner might need some therapy for that, but I can speak from experience that is a nude, nude path.
I hope you can manage to do what's right for your stepdaughter and yourself regardless of the above. I can't imagine the damage he has done to you both.
You lost me you say you are exclusive m, then literally in the next sentence said you cooled off to focus on yourselves. Idk what cooled off to you means but to me that’s not exclusive anymore. If he slept with someone while you were “cooled” off I mean it’s shitty but you weren’t together. Idk what to tell you. Seems everyone in this comment section completely rose past that part of the post.
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