There’s no such thing as perfect, maybe he is perfect for you, but it’s been 4 months so check yourself on your expectations and don’t put him on a pedestal – that isn’t fair to either of you.
41 and has only been to 1 strip club in his life? Sorry- not buying that. I’ve heard that line before and usually it means « it’s not my scene » but by 41 he has likely been on business trips, to bachelor parties etc
Why do you feel uncomfortable? Because he is going to a sexually charged environment where alcohol is served and you won’t be there to supervise. If you’re that concerned you can talk to him and establish boundaries you are comfortable with (no touching, no private dances, etc) but 4 months in, he has done the courtesy of letting you know about the invite and that it’s not his scene, so I would probably leave it at that.
Welcome to the next level of dating someone with a child. You are now moved in together, the dynamics change. Much as you’d probably like to tell her to pack sand, the reality is that now there is a child living with you and you have to dress accordingly. This is just part of growing up and moving to the next level. Do you need to go out and get a set of pajamas and slippers? No. But a pair of shorts and a comfortable t-shirt is fair
In the day to day what do you do for her? What does she do for you? Do you have an issue with doing things for her?
Someone who feels they are never treated special may do things to try to get that. She might see this as a huge red flag of someone who's never going to do anything for her or make her feel special.
All that said this is just a one-off. I wouldn't put any weight on it unless it's a part of a trend of events.
The one who is responsible for this is her. You didn’t know. She knew. Not telling isn’t ruining something, it’s enabling her to continue. Don’t become an accomplice.
Yeah she needs to go my man. Take whatever measures necessary to live in that house without her. Maybe friends or otherwise people looking for a room to rent?
I learned one thing from dating and that's whenever one or the other party starts going the “I don't know about us” route, it's time to move on.
hes just being a pussy. it isnt bad at all. takes like 20 mins and no pain afterwards. you can walk right out of the doctors office.
My opinion-
There’s no such thing as perfect, maybe he is perfect for you, but it’s been 4 months so check yourself on your expectations and don’t put him on a pedestal – that isn’t fair to either of you.
41 and has only been to 1 strip club in his life? Sorry- not buying that. I’ve heard that line before and usually it means « it’s not my scene » but by 41 he has likely been on business trips, to bachelor parties etc
Why do you feel uncomfortable? Because he is going to a sexually charged environment where alcohol is served and you won’t be there to supervise. If you’re that concerned you can talk to him and establish boundaries you are comfortable with (no touching, no private dances, etc) but 4 months in, he has done the courtesy of letting you know about the invite and that it’s not his scene, so I would probably leave it at that.
Welcome to the next level of dating someone with a child. You are now moved in together, the dynamics change. Much as you’d probably like to tell her to pack sand, the reality is that now there is a child living with you and you have to dress accordingly. This is just part of growing up and moving to the next level. Do you need to go out and get a set of pajamas and slippers? No. But a pair of shorts and a comfortable t-shirt is fair
In the day to day what do you do for her? What does she do for you? Do you have an issue with doing things for her?
Someone who feels they are never treated special may do things to try to get that. She might see this as a huge red flag of someone who's never going to do anything for her or make her feel special.
All that said this is just a one-off. I wouldn't put any weight on it unless it's a part of a trend of events.
The one who is responsible for this is her. You didn’t know. She knew. Not telling isn’t ruining something, it’s enabling her to continue. Don’t become an accomplice.
Thank you.
Yeah she needs to go my man. Take whatever measures necessary to live in that house without her. Maybe friends or otherwise people looking for a room to rent?
I learned one thing from dating and that's whenever one or the other party starts going the “I don't know about us” route, it's time to move on.
Please try to understand my situation and that I do feel guilty and shitty about what I did